weave
Tuesday. Was looking for the instant coffee but couldn’t find it.
Slept over at my Grandpa’s last night. Stayed up too late scrolling instagram reels. I downloaded instagram last night for… some reason, not a good one. Ended up being on there from 11pm to 2am. Too long. Jeeze Louise.
Had the strength to delete it, thank god. Man what a siren’s call. Very strong pull.
Munching on two President’s Choice Peanut Butter and Dark Chocolate Chip Protein granola bars. Tasty. Kind of coffee tasting. Adequate substitute for the instant coffee, for now.
A nice pinkish purple iris sits besides me. Some other plants too.
Slept half on the coach, half on the floor last night. For how uncomfortable the setup looked I feel quite rested. I brought my cpap machine but didn’t use it. Indiana beat Miami in the college football championships last night. Flames lost to the Devils in overtime; a tough loss.
It’s 5:09AM. 5:10AM now. I guess I’ll write until 6am and see from there.
Yesterday I went to a funeral home with my mom and Grandpa. We spoke with a funeral director about my Grandma’s funeral. It was good but draining. My Grandpa was looking rough. Sad. But I think it will be nice. I think.
The funeral director was a year younger than me. Weird. She has a pet snake. The funeral will be on Valentine’s Day. My Grandma liked flowers. I hope people bring flowers.
We asked my uncle to make an urn to put her ashes in. He is an artist and I think that would be really nice. He was game. Bananas on the counter over there.
Communication is easy and tough at the same time. Simple yet hard.
After the funeral home I had lunch with my mom and grandpa. It was nice. I wrote an update to the family group chat in WhatsApp. Before the funeral home I found a poem on my grandpa and grandma’s coffee table. The poem was about friendship. It was a really beautiful poem. I read it out loud to my mom and my grandpa. They liked it. So did I.
After lunch I went to my friend’s house. Some old friends from high school were there. It was good seeing them. Later another old friend came by to drop something off. My friend and I and him talked about grief and loss. It was a really nice conversation. Meaningful. My friends brother came over halfway through that convo. And then later my friend’s roommate. It was very social. Nice.
My friend and I recorded a new podcast episode. In it we discuss the first episode of Knights of the Seven Kingdoms; a Game of Thrones spin off series. I really enjoyed recording that episode. I hadn’t seen the episode so he just explained to me what happened. It was funny and light and fun.
After that we watched the first episode together. Good start to a series in my opinion.
I went home and turned on the college football. I then went to a yoga Nidra class with my mom and our neighbours at this yoga place down the highway. It was relaxing.
After we went home and I showered and packed a bag for my grandpa’s and headed over. When I got here I watched the last period and overtime of the Flames game. We watched the last play of the college football.
I stayed over here for two reasons. One was because I think it’s good that my grandpa has someone with him for the next couple days. Two because there is a pool here and I’m training for a half ironman in July and want to get a swim in. My grandpa’s doctor said he needs to start swimming again so we are going to swim together this morning. I’m looking forward to it.
Water bottle. Yoga matt. Trail mix. Step stool.
5:25AM. How time flys.
Banana’s looking ripe. Glenfiddich. Mozol Tov. Farmer’s Almanac. Things and stuff. Head kind of hurts. Calves are sore. I forgot I went for a run before the yoga last night. Zone 2 the whole time, 40 minutes. Felt good. Light and easy. During sunset. Nice and pretty. Ran past some deer.
Stuffed river otter toy. Sapling. Cactus looking thing. Bigger plant. Bronze. Picture. Painting. Lamp. Pillow, pillow, pillow, pillow, pillow. Quilt. Tigger and Piglet and Pooh. Rabbit too.
A fake cat. Meow. Massage chair. Books. Binders. Blinds. Tired eyes. Drooping neck. Pumping heart. Drumming in ears. Cough cough cough. Bank and drug mart and strip mall parking lot. A road that leads to the foothills. My old school and a sprawling neighbourhood. My whole childhood represented in a glance. New buildings, old as me buildings. I guess I’m old now or at least older.
Friends and girlfriends and sports. Stories good and bad and in between. Running errands, wasting time, having fun, running late. Worry, fear, anger, sadness. Excitement, tears, good news, milestones. Breakfast, lunch, and dinners. Family always in-between the seams.
Up and up and up. And sometimes down. But mostly clumped. Rendezvous. Late nights, early mornings. Mid day weekends. Movies and parties and mischief. Learning new things. Sometimes things you wished you’d forget. Always connected, a rich fabric or tapestry. Community. Important.
It’s what makes me… me.