the older i get the more confused i get
Why do I have so many books I don’t care to read?
Why do I not want to do the things I say I want?
Why do I get so tired from looking at my phone?
Why do I get so tired from not looking at my phone?
Am I my things? Am I my body? Am I my thoughts? My relationships? Something else?
Why do I feel responsible for others? To others? I’m told I shouldn’t but I do.
I like music but I hate it. I love solitude but it’s not good for me. Did I make a wrong turn somewhere?
Does it make sense to turn back or carry on? I’m not sure anymore.
Food in. Waste out. Breathing in between. Wake up. Sleep.
Do I control much else? It sure doesn’t feel that way.
Maybe sometimes. Maybe often. Maybe all the times.
Maybe.
And sometimes I get it. But most of the time I don’t.
Do you?